Hippos and lookalikes

Talking of hippopotami, for that is the correct term, “what’s THAT all about”?! Man they’re ugly. They make Jackie Stallone look cute, but they’re more pleasing on the eye than Donatella Versace: Joan Rivers was right about her. Suffice it to say if I looked like them I just wouldn’t have the balls to show my face, let alone that huuuuMUNgous body. Oprah darlin’ you didn’t need to worry, there’s always others less fortunate. Someone should tell them about Atkins. Oh and have I mentioned their temperament? Someone needs a little anger-management, or maybe counselling. I guess it’s coz they’re so goddam ugly that they hate the world and everything in it. They even hate themselves and fight like... well dogs according to the saying, but I protest. They fight like bitches – those dogs that hang around the Good Ol Boys in their check shirts and jeans, pumped full of beer and IVF shots coz they’ve had too much exposure to fertilisers - you know who you are.... but I’m not here to judge. In fact I quite enjoy a bitch-fight, all that scratching and swearing, fistfuls of fur flying and bras snapping and the lesbians sure pack a punch – it’s better than Jerry Springer!